j_young_80
16-08-2010, 04:36 PM
As Director of Inebriation, I feel it's high time this much anticipated event finally saw the light of day.
Date: Saturday, 28th August
Start: 12:30pm, Vikings Club, Tuggeranong
Who: Any man, women and child up for an afternoon of drunken hilarity
What the hell?
Based on the proven Pub Golf model, but adapted for cycling. All riders[1] have a minimum number of gear changes[2] they must complete at each section of the stage. Each of these gear changes is worth a 1 second time bonus. Riders can exceed the number of gear changes required at each stop for additional bonuses and a chance at the GC jersey.
Sounds Easy!
But there's a catch. At the start of the stage, riders will recieve a listing of Big and Small Chain ring "gears" that MUST ALL be consumed prior to the end of the stage for you to be eligible for victory. Women will only need to tick off the Small Ring gears, but Male riders must run through all the gears. No. of Chain Rings x rear cassette (10spd folks). One of these drinks MUST be consumed at each stop to allow riders to continue to the next.
http://images.jensonusa.com/large/cr/cr408b01sil__175__42.jpghttp://www.fullcycles.com/images/shimano-dura-ace-10sp-cassette.jpg
Jerseys;
Most Combative (rider that beat's the minimum by the most drinks at end of each stop)
KOM (Specific endurance climbing challenges on the course will allow competitors to fright for the Polka Dot)
Sprint (specific Sprint challenges on the course will allow competitors to fight for the coveted green jersey)
General Classification
The Course
All you need to know is the first stop. A brief will be given at the beginning and a race pack provided with course maps, gear checklists and rules. It will roughly simulate the course profile of Stage 8 in the Vuelta and there will be feedzones indicated along the way. Any eating outside of feedzones will result in penalties which are outlined later.
http://www.lavuelta.com/10/imgrecorrido/8_perfil.jpg
The Rules
Due to the dynamic, ever changing environment that the course follows, there are likely to be a number of unforeseen occurrences that the governing body has not catered for. In the result of such an occurrence, any in-race disputes will be settled via Tiger, Man, Gun[3].
Water consumption is allowed and in fact encouraged.
Must make sign on (first stage) to be included in the event.
Must use (consume) all required gears
Ladies only need to use the small chain ring , Men to also use the Big Dog
Consumption of light alcohol, or half strength liquor will result in instant disqualification. (blood doping)
If UCI officials[4] deem that you can no longer change gears safely you will be removed from the stage.
Missing mandatory transport stages will result in disqualification (motorized doping)
Failure to meet minimum course requirements at each stop will result in disqualification
At least one ”gear” must be used at each stop.
Drinks consumed at Sprint Points or KOM’s DO NOT count towards the minimum requirements for that stop.
Failure to finish the stage whilst wearing Green, KOM or leaders jersey will result in the next best placed rider being awarded the jersey.
Riders can increase their time bonuses by using more gears than required at each stop. Gears can be re-used any number of times, however you MUST have used all gears available to you by the end of the stage to qualify for the race victory.
The penultimate stop in the stage is the Time Trial. Riders will go head to head in a battle against the clock. The Race of Truth will decide the ultimate victor.
Race Infringements resulting in fines
<O:p
Riders found urinating outside of designated stops will receive a 3 gear penalty[5]
Course littering (throwing up) will result in a 3 gear penalty.
No eating outside of feedzones. If riders are seen consuming food from the team car outside a designated feedzone a 3 gear penalty will be enforced.
Race infringements resulting in Disqualification<O:p</O:p
<O:p
If at any time the race director feels you are bringing the sport into disrepute, are a danger to the peloton, endanger your fellow riders ability to continue to race or exhibit signs of extreme social retardation you will be removed from the race. If the race director exhibits these traits, the race sub committee will have no choice but to put in place emergency event management and a new race director will be chosen via T, M, G.
If you refuse any polite request to hand over your race number, race officials will have no choice but to administer a slipping, sliding kickbox to the head to remove you from competition.
Removal from an approved stop by UCI officials results in disqualification.
If a UCI official enforces a gear lockout and you have not made the minimum number of gear changes required, you will be disqualified. If you have made the required gear changes and find your gears locked out, it is at the discretion of the next stop officials as to whether your gear lock is removed and you are allowed to continue in the race.
Deviating from the course or missing any mandatory stops listed will result in disqualification.
Failure to meet the required number of gear changes in the time limit stipulated will result in disqualification.
Tactics
<O:p
There are many tactics that can be employed to ensure stronger riders are tested throughout the course. This can be done in a number of ways;
<O:p
The suicidal, or reverse breakaway;<O:p</O:p
A teammate sets a furious pace early, knowing that he will pay dearly a few kilometers down the road. He may however, drag a few other contenders out into the wind and out of their comfort zone, softening them up for a later attack from a GC contender.
<O:p
Pat the Big Dog:<O:p</O:p
Knock off the bigger gears early and try to settle into the hurt locker before spinning the legs out in the small ring later in the race, while competitors struggle with the big gradients.
<O:p
Spinervals:<O:p</O:p
The opposite of the previous method, start slowly and try to peak at the right time to claim victory.
<O:p
The Jens Voigt:<O:p</O:p
Gear Up until you taste blood in your mouse – pray that you have done enough damage to the peloton early to get over the line.
<O:p
The Man from Manx;<O:p</O:p
Stay out of the wind until the final kilometer and unleash a double fingered powerful finish that the peloton cannot match. (likely to result in hospitalization)
Register your interest in this event in this thread either here or via PM so that event planners have a gauge on numbers.
Vikings Cycling Club in no way endorses irresponsible drinking, or behaviour of any sort.
[1] Drinkers
[2] Alcoholic Beverages
[3] Full Rules and explanation to follow at a later juncture
[4] Police, Barkeeps, Any person of Authorita that has the right to restrict your
[5] Penalties do NOT incur Time Bonuses
Date: Saturday, 28th August
Start: 12:30pm, Vikings Club, Tuggeranong
Who: Any man, women and child up for an afternoon of drunken hilarity
What the hell?
Based on the proven Pub Golf model, but adapted for cycling. All riders[1] have a minimum number of gear changes[2] they must complete at each section of the stage. Each of these gear changes is worth a 1 second time bonus. Riders can exceed the number of gear changes required at each stop for additional bonuses and a chance at the GC jersey.
Sounds Easy!
But there's a catch. At the start of the stage, riders will recieve a listing of Big and Small Chain ring "gears" that MUST ALL be consumed prior to the end of the stage for you to be eligible for victory. Women will only need to tick off the Small Ring gears, but Male riders must run through all the gears. No. of Chain Rings x rear cassette (10spd folks). One of these drinks MUST be consumed at each stop to allow riders to continue to the next.
http://images.jensonusa.com/large/cr/cr408b01sil__175__42.jpghttp://www.fullcycles.com/images/shimano-dura-ace-10sp-cassette.jpg
Jerseys;
Most Combative (rider that beat's the minimum by the most drinks at end of each stop)
KOM (Specific endurance climbing challenges on the course will allow competitors to fright for the Polka Dot)
Sprint (specific Sprint challenges on the course will allow competitors to fight for the coveted green jersey)
General Classification
The Course
All you need to know is the first stop. A brief will be given at the beginning and a race pack provided with course maps, gear checklists and rules. It will roughly simulate the course profile of Stage 8 in the Vuelta and there will be feedzones indicated along the way. Any eating outside of feedzones will result in penalties which are outlined later.
http://www.lavuelta.com/10/imgrecorrido/8_perfil.jpg
The Rules
Due to the dynamic, ever changing environment that the course follows, there are likely to be a number of unforeseen occurrences that the governing body has not catered for. In the result of such an occurrence, any in-race disputes will be settled via Tiger, Man, Gun[3].
Water consumption is allowed and in fact encouraged.
Must make sign on (first stage) to be included in the event.
Must use (consume) all required gears
Ladies only need to use the small chain ring , Men to also use the Big Dog
Consumption of light alcohol, or half strength liquor will result in instant disqualification. (blood doping)
If UCI officials[4] deem that you can no longer change gears safely you will be removed from the stage.
Missing mandatory transport stages will result in disqualification (motorized doping)
Failure to meet minimum course requirements at each stop will result in disqualification
At least one ”gear” must be used at each stop.
Drinks consumed at Sprint Points or KOM’s DO NOT count towards the minimum requirements for that stop.
Failure to finish the stage whilst wearing Green, KOM or leaders jersey will result in the next best placed rider being awarded the jersey.
Riders can increase their time bonuses by using more gears than required at each stop. Gears can be re-used any number of times, however you MUST have used all gears available to you by the end of the stage to qualify for the race victory.
The penultimate stop in the stage is the Time Trial. Riders will go head to head in a battle against the clock. The Race of Truth will decide the ultimate victor.
Race Infringements resulting in fines
<O:p
Riders found urinating outside of designated stops will receive a 3 gear penalty[5]
Course littering (throwing up) will result in a 3 gear penalty.
No eating outside of feedzones. If riders are seen consuming food from the team car outside a designated feedzone a 3 gear penalty will be enforced.
Race infringements resulting in Disqualification<O:p</O:p
<O:p
If at any time the race director feels you are bringing the sport into disrepute, are a danger to the peloton, endanger your fellow riders ability to continue to race or exhibit signs of extreme social retardation you will be removed from the race. If the race director exhibits these traits, the race sub committee will have no choice but to put in place emergency event management and a new race director will be chosen via T, M, G.
If you refuse any polite request to hand over your race number, race officials will have no choice but to administer a slipping, sliding kickbox to the head to remove you from competition.
Removal from an approved stop by UCI officials results in disqualification.
If a UCI official enforces a gear lockout and you have not made the minimum number of gear changes required, you will be disqualified. If you have made the required gear changes and find your gears locked out, it is at the discretion of the next stop officials as to whether your gear lock is removed and you are allowed to continue in the race.
Deviating from the course or missing any mandatory stops listed will result in disqualification.
Failure to meet the required number of gear changes in the time limit stipulated will result in disqualification.
Tactics
<O:p
There are many tactics that can be employed to ensure stronger riders are tested throughout the course. This can be done in a number of ways;
<O:p
The suicidal, or reverse breakaway;<O:p</O:p
A teammate sets a furious pace early, knowing that he will pay dearly a few kilometers down the road. He may however, drag a few other contenders out into the wind and out of their comfort zone, softening them up for a later attack from a GC contender.
<O:p
Pat the Big Dog:<O:p</O:p
Knock off the bigger gears early and try to settle into the hurt locker before spinning the legs out in the small ring later in the race, while competitors struggle with the big gradients.
<O:p
Spinervals:<O:p</O:p
The opposite of the previous method, start slowly and try to peak at the right time to claim victory.
<O:p
The Jens Voigt:<O:p</O:p
Gear Up until you taste blood in your mouse – pray that you have done enough damage to the peloton early to get over the line.
<O:p
The Man from Manx;<O:p</O:p
Stay out of the wind until the final kilometer and unleash a double fingered powerful finish that the peloton cannot match. (likely to result in hospitalization)
Register your interest in this event in this thread either here or via PM so that event planners have a gauge on numbers.
Vikings Cycling Club in no way endorses irresponsible drinking, or behaviour of any sort.
[1] Drinkers
[2] Alcoholic Beverages
[3] Full Rules and explanation to follow at a later juncture
[4] Police, Barkeeps, Any person of Authorita that has the right to restrict your
[5] Penalties do NOT incur Time Bonuses